Someday, I Suppose…

I’m feeling this weird almost… lacadaisical warmth today. Could be that this has been a very warm week in SoCal, could be that Novel 2 is plodding steadily along towards completion, could be that my Sister In Law is in town and I like her, and Sam is having a great week (and I am having a great week interacting with him, mostly) and we spent last weekend w/ Miss Twist and Perfect Tommy and will prolly visit Cassandra’s Grove this weekend…

I’m going to have to, I chuckle to myself-this will be odd to explain-, I’m going to have to stop referring to my friends and loved ones by the nicknames I know them by when those nicknames are what I use for fictional characters that resemble them- if I ever get published. I mean, lets face it, if I have a bunch of unpublished novels with characters named Miss Twist, Perfect Tommy, and they visit a place called Cassandra’s Grove… thats all fine and well. But if they see the light of day, I’ll really need to work on keeping the fictional world seperate from the one I walk and talk in… for my own sanity, at least.

Which sort of brings me to todays lollygagging. eew.

Does that mean someone choked on a lollipop? Er, nevermind.

The following websites I share with you, because I love you. Each website sells an item that is used, hinted at, or noticed in one of the Nick Syn stories. Someday I’d like to own some of these things, add them to my own collection. Someday, I suppose.

First off, we have Ghost in a Bottle. Pretty straight forward. I like macabre conversation pieces, and I think this would go great on a bookshelf between the Scottish Rite Encylopedias and the Jambiya my grandfather brought back from Arabia under mysterious circumstances…

Then there is the art of Sarina Brewer. Not only is she herself a stunning creature, but she also manufactures them. From dead bodies. It might be a bit weird, but I admire her work deeply. And since the adventures of Nick Syn very often come across these sorts of things- while living- I don’t see I shouldn’t have one or two pieces on the bookshelf next to the autographed Hans Holzer.

Mike Libby is an amazing artist as well, and if Guillermo Del Toro doesn’t already own a few of his pieces the big lug is missing out. Bugs are kind of mysterious and magical, if you ask me. Clockwork bugs just make them steampunk and awesome. I particularly admire some of the beetles. The arachnids, while more formidable, honestly give me a wiggins.

Finally, one of my favorites, is the mysterious Pyramid Gallery, feature reproductions of Philip LeMarchand’s puzzle boxes… as music boxes. Fucking awesome. Scroll down to see the three versions they currently take orders for- I like the Lament Configuration, for obvious reasons, but I admit that The Hollow Heart, with it’s New York themed glyphs, would be a great “WTF?” gift for my wife someday.

It’s good to have goals, but sometimes it’s important to talk about the daydreams that nightmares give me.

Oh, and I totally want a Khukuri too. To hang under the creepy Masonic swords- hopefully ceremonial- that I discovered in a forgotten attic on the outskirts of Washington D.C…

Unto the 7th Generation…

This was supposed to be a Wii post.

A Wii? Yes, a Wii. We were Wii’d for Christmas by 2 of our dearest friends. A truly unexpected, and magnificently generous gift- so much so that both The Missus and I have been stunned and haven’t taken it out of it’s box yet. “The White Elephant in the Living Room” my Wife calls it. She capitalizes words, I can hear it. I do too, I wonder if she can hear it when I do?

Anyhow, it’s a wonderful gift (we assume, not having had the courage to try plugging it in yet) and will doubtless provide Sam and us with hours of frustration and sore elbows/wrists…

But the truth is, I can’t quite focus on Wii things, but rather- on January 12th, I will turn 34.

Thirty-Four years old, this coming Monday. Holy Shit, for reals? This Monday?

“My birthday is in a couple weeks, right?” I ask my Wife this morning. She rolls her eyes at me.

“It’s on Monday. Today is the 8th, it’ in Four Days,” she says, capitalizing some words verbally.

I haven’t always been much of a Birthday guy in the past. For years, and I don’t know why, I mostly shunned the attention that Birthday’s bring. Maybe quiet drinks (usually getting rowdy after a few) with friends, maybe a nice dinner. We did a shindig thing for my 30th, and that was nice. Don’t recall doing anything particularly interesting (or not) for my 31st- oh! We went out for Ethiopian food w/ two other couples. 32nd was a big one- we had a bunch of friends over and told them all to bring “exciting” Potato Chips, and beer. A lot of Kettle Chips flavors were sampled and a LOT of really good beer was consumed. (man, Brennan really brought the A-Game in beer selection that year, didn’t he?).

Last year was quiet, just an intimate dinner with the other January Babies- me and Chris and Shelby and Bri (w/ Chris and My own non-Jan wives- and Sam, of course) and that was pretty kickass.

This year, I want to spend my Birthday with ALL of my friends- obviously that isn’t logistically (or financially) possible. A lot of people aren’t local/have lives/don’t like me very much/we can’t afford to host another party.

NEXT year, when I hit that solid in-the-middle 35, NEXT year, there will be a Party of some kind. Mebbe we’ll descend, en masse, upon Ernie’s Taco House again. Or someplace else (is there someplace else?).

34 years old (almost). I have a swell Family. Some really dear friends, Good People. I have a job- bonus- and I even have some time to work on what I want to be doing- which is Writing.

Also, but then, I bet we’ll have hooked up the Wii and leaned how to use them fancy little nunchuks.

There is a Lot of Dust around here…

My plan is to write a second article- much like the one below, about Darcy- on the subject of a fascinating figure I see wandering around my neighborhood from time to time that has made his way into The Novel…

But not today.

There are days when it is really hard to write- we all know that, have experienced that- maybe we have a headache or the neighbors are playing distracting music, or a small child is climbing our leg while shrieking for us to play with them…

Ack. My tenses are fucking me up, and I’m writing this, so god only knows how well you are handling it, so I’ll stop.

The holidays are hard for me, creatively. As father and husband and friend, I had a great time. But as a writer, I sort of feel like the time is wasted. Writing at home, for me, is very difficult. Unless I get up at 4, thereby guaranteeing myself approximately 2 Sam-Free hours… so I got very little writing done over the last 2 weeks.

And now, trying to reactivate the frantic push of energy I was feeling but unable to tap into, I’m faltering and stumbling- and let’s face it, I do actually have an actual job to do some days. Tons of paperwork (someone left the company and hadn’t done their job for the last month, thusly screwing up my personal schedule), and some actual heavy lifting work this morning -which I love while it is going on, it makes my brain feel fresh and clean and my body ache in good ways. Afterwards, the endorphins drop off and I’m cold again. Cold and sitting in a concrete box with one side open to the cool air, and damn few people to interact with.

I get somewhat down from time to time, sitting here. About the writing, about being a good parent or husband or even a human being, about making any progress from being an aspiring writer to being a paid writer- oh, incidentally, I’ve figured out where I stand on the whole “Professional” vs. “Amateur” writer thing. About my birthday, which is coming up soon, and how should I celebrate that.

Ah, yes: can I just shrug this off as a seasonal malaise? The New Year; a symbolic birth. My birthday; an anniversary of an actual one. These could be piling up on my thoughts, making the whole struggle- the hard work, low pay, uncertainty and such- feel more heavy than it really is.

Well, it’ll pass. It always does. 2-FISTED is actually coming along WONDERFULLY. I’m very pleased, and very near to done. I hope from the title you don’t think it’s (just) about porn. DOGS is still an edit, a huge messy edit, and it isn’t nearly as Honest and Good a story as 2-FISTED but there is a lot to be said for it, I think, and so I’m going to keep struggling to finish editing the novel I finished whirlwind writing earlier this week a year ago- really, using NANOWRIMO was good for me, but the push to fulfill my daily quota made for an incredibly sloppy 1st novel…

The screenwriting stuff is slow, as always. I’m more comfortable with that than I once was, partially because my Partner and I are putting out some really solid work, it’s just taking a while to finish polishing- which, I know, kind of awkward in an industry that wants everything NOW NOW NOW (and then promptly ignores it for months on end), but while we’re still really just writing for Us and honing our craft, I think it’s okay- and the work we’ve been producing backs up my optimism.

Oh, on the “Professional vs. Amateur” writer debate:

I am an Aspiring Writer, since I’m not getting paid. An “Amateur” writer has nothing to do with not getting paid, rather an Amateur Writer is the person that doesn’t write- I mean they don’t write blogs, they don’t write articles, screenplays, novels, short stories- the amateur writer Doesn’t but Talks about it. The aspiring writer Does and Tries. A Professional Writer is the one who knows how to be on time, not smell like Joe Esterhaus (until they are paid like Joe Esterhaus), and how to use spell-check. A Paid Writer- well, that is the goal, isn’t it?